11+ nerves

It's 11+ tests tomorrow and I don't know who's more nervous.......mum and dad or the son who's taking it!!!

We have a 13 yr old who has already gone through this who comfortably passed his and attends a really nice grammar school close by. This school is perfect for him as it is mixed and because he is a sensitive soul we thought it would be better for him. He loves it there ( as much as any boy 'loves' school!) and has made a great set of friends that from the beginning of year 7 to today in year 9 have all stuck by each other.

However, I think this makes it more difficult for the second child. He also wants to go to the same school as his brother, he has already had a look around and loves the drama department there ( as some of you may remember he is a budding 'actor'!!). He is also a very capable child and has been in top sets for maths and literacy in junior school. But there is no guarantee that he will get through on the test!

He has worked hard towards it with his dad ( which we did with our older son) however, we have tried not to put too much pressure on him about it. Rightly or wrongly we never sent either of our boys to a tutor in order for them to pass. Any work they have undertaken over the summer has been worked through by my OH who seems to have the patience of a saint when it comes to school work!! We live on the border of Kent so the children can also apply to do the Kent 11+ too and I know some of the kids from his year have taken that on Saturday. He decided (just like my eldest) that he didn't want to take this test as it would possibly mean that he would end up in a school out of our borough that he would have to travel to, and therefore lots of his friends would not be living close to him. So in the end we didn't register him for that test as there would be no point sending him to a school he didn't want to go to.

So now all his hopes are on the test tomorrow and Wednesday. He seems confident and we have confidence in him. But is it wrong to try and prepare him in case he doesn't get through? That is what we have been doing. Trying to tell him it isn't the end of the world if he doesn't pass. It doesn't make him any less capable than his brother. There is a lot of competition between them over the silliest of things so this really would cause a major upset!!

We certainly don't want him to feel any sort of failure. We don't want to be seen as treating him any different from his brother if he doesn't get through.

So the next 3 weeks waiting for the results just won't go quick enough!!! Talk about wishing your life away. As with his older brother we have told him that the letter will arrive and we will not open it as this will be his job when he gets home from school.
( What we won't tell him is that we will have steamed the letter open at lunchtime when it arrives so we know the outcome before he gets his grubby mits on the thing!!)

And then the drama will start!! The next day at the school playground.............kids and adults alike all eager to hear if your child has passed or not!! Whispers behind peoples backs about the shock passes and 'fails' ( although no child at the age of 10 and 11 should be seen as a failure!!!) But that's what it all comes down to with a lot of parents these days.

So on that note......

A HUGE GOOD LUCK TO MY SON AND ALL THE CHILDREN TAKING THE 11+ IN THE NEXT 2 DAYS

Mums Web TV: Mums half Hour- PLease tune in!

I don't know if anyone has caught this show but I managed to see it on You Tube. It's a new live and interactive web TV show that discusses everyday parenting issues. You can submit your own question relating to the topic and therefore allows you to become involved.

Below are the details of the 2nd episode including a link to view the 1st episode and also to submit a question to the panel for the show on Friday 8th July @ 13.30

Mums Half Hour Episode Two: Join Us Live

The panel discuss Summer holidays, competitive parenting and buying your child’s first shoes

Show date: 8^th July 2011

Show time: 13:30

Our children may look forward to them, but for parents, Summer holidays require careful planning. Whether you want to take the family abroad or stay in the UK, figuring out how to keep them entertained while not breaking the bank is not always easy.

Following on from the success of the first show which covered the pressures of modern parenting, episode two in the Mums Half Hour series will see the panel discuss and give their top tips on what to do with your children during the holidays, from charity farms to nature trails, to encouraging them to use their imagination to create their own fun games.

It’s also important that you don’t burn out during the holidays as well, so the mums will talk about how best to maximise your own ‘mum time’. They’ll also look at how to steer clear of competitive parenting and the best way to buy your child’s first shoes.

In this live and interactive webTV show, our panel will also be taking your questions and thoughts so if you have something to say, they want to hear it!

Our panel join us live online at www.youtube.com/startriteshoes on 8^th July at 13.30 to discuss Summer holiday dilemmas.

For another chance to win a year’s supply of Start-rite shoes, log onto www.youtube.com/startriteshoes and submit a question along with your contact details

For more information visit www.youtube.com/startriteshoes

 THE LINK BELOW WILL DIRECT YOU TO THE SITE THAT THE PROGRAMME WILL AIR LIVE ON FRIDAY 8TH JULY @13.30 AND WILL ALSO ALLOW YOU TO SUBMIT A QUESTION FOR THE PANEL.

PLEASE tune in!

http://www.studiotalk.tv/show/mums-half-hour-episode-two-join-us-live

'A Bad Parent'

That's what I was told by my 10yr old me on Friday evening.

And why??

We had made the decision to cancel him going on his Cub camp!!

Ok, harsh I can hear you all say and maybe it was, it certainly wasn't an easy decision to carry through as my husband is a parent/helper and was going ( still went actually) to the camp also!!

HARSH.........yes you said it earlier.

However, this 10yr old has the tendency to rule the household. He is dominating, loud and controlling. Recently he has had a lot of things come his way giving him great opportunities and fun times. In the meantime his older brother has been pushed from pillar to post to accommodate all the goings on, none of which have been to his benefit. This time the attitude progressively got worse over the last week and so we had a few words and warned him that if it continued he would not be allowed to go to camp.

Now I'm sure I'm not the only parent who has threatened these things and then at the last minute backed down. So tell me what does that teach children?

I'm sick of constantly not following through with things that I have said just because I don't want my boys to miss out. WELL NOT THIS TIME!

So on Friday we did it. We said he wouldn' be going to camp and we stuck with it. To which my 10yr old replied ' you are a bad parent'.................straight to the heart!!!!

This decision was made extra difficult as he came out of school sporting a gift bag which had a 'Star of the Week' trophy for something he did while on his 3 day school trip!!

This is the problem, he is a real Jackal and Hyde character. When he is behaving he is just a great fun boy to have around and can be so generous and helpful, however when he is not behaving he can make life in the house a real struggle.

All weekend he would not let it show that he had missed going on camp until today when he mentioned the school trip to Chessington,due to take place on Friday. It was at that point he decided to apologise for his behaviour and what he said, probably more to do with him thinking that he might not be able to go on that either!!!!

Then came the chat about the fact that we all do things wrong occasionally ( except me of course, that goes without saying) but it takes a better person to apologise.


So hopefully following through with the decision had some impact. Maybe he will take the warning next time knowing that as parents we can make the harsh decisions. Hopefully we haven't scarred him for life!!!!

SO TELL ME...........AM I A BAD PARENT????

What do you mean there's no tooth fairy!!!

I love all the sneaky mystery behind things like the 'Tooth Fairy' ,'Santa' 'Birthdays', and even the ' Mum will kiss it and make it better'!!!!!

But my boys are older now, one a tween and one a teen!!! (Surely I can't be old enough)

Now although my oldest now knows there is no 'Father Christmas' or 'Tooth Fairy' he plays the game, not for him you understand but for me!! There comes a point when they no longer need these things but they become increasingly more important to you. ( I think it has something to do with DENIAL of my children getting older)

However, my youngest is not so helpful to his mothers cause. We have never as parents sat our boys down and blatantly told them that these wonderful people don't exist, they just find out by questioning what happens and putting logical thinking into place ( I mean, 1 man able to visit every child's house in 1 night and leave a gift!!! GET REAL they barely remember to get our gifts let alone anything else.....Xmas dinner, their parents pressies........NEED I GO ON?)

Anyway, I digress, My youngest will just do his best to get you to admit that all these things come from you.........Well I refuse to do it.

He lost a tooth 2 days ago and decided to put it in a small envelope with a message on it that read......

'Dear Tooth Fairy

Please may I have an extra £1 so I can afford to buy the Walkie Talkies that I want.'


OH REALLY!

1st of all, I have never risen the price of a tooth with the years or the inflation and don't intend to start now.

2nd of all, I know this reverse psychology crap as I have used it for years to get them to think that doing the things they don't want to do was their idea in the first place.

3rd Don't play me at my own game, and don't try and kid a kidder.........I have been there, seen it and done it, with the T shirt for proof!!!


Now with that said I truly think he's a chip of the old block and will go a long way. As the saying goes in my house when they try to have me over but fail miserably.........

10 out of 10 for trying!!! ( positive parenting and all that ) LOL